i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
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