I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize