Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
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