Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
he quoted the bible to break up with me
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize