There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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