so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize