her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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