Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize