i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
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ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
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it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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