But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't EVER smell your tampon
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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