i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize