my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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