Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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