I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
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He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
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i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
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