did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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