Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
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