what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize