soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
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