I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
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