So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize