The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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