i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Randomize