I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
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