Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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