He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize