i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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