Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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