Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
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