guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize