you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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