No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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