we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
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