I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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