Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize