Reggie can tackle my bush.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
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