He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
17 year olds will be the death of me.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Randomize