does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Randomize