its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
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