The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
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