My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize