I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
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Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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