last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
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