Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
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I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
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A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
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