Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize