As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Randomize