I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
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I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
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So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
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