Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize