with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
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