how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Randomize