I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
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